Party Ship -Kay Ryan
September 30, 2013, 9:42 pm
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You are a
land I can’t
stand leaving
and can’t not.
My party ship
is pulling out.
We all have
hats. I try to
toot some notes
you’ll understand
but this was not
our instrument
or plan.


Huggy Bear
September 28, 2013, 11:09 pm
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1920’s slang
September 28, 2013, 3:00 pm
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1. Ankle: to walk

2. “Applesauce!”: “Horsefeathers!”

3. “Bank’s closed!”: what you tell someone to stop making out

4. Bearcat: a lively, spirited woman, possibly with a fiery streak

5. Berries: like “bee’s knees,” denotes that something is good, desirable or pleasing. “That sounds like berries to me!”

6. Bimbo: refers to a macho man

7. Bluenose: term for a prude or individual deemed to be a killjoy

8. Bubs: a woman’s boobs

9. “Bushwa!”: “Bullshit!”

10. “Butt me!”: “I would like a cigarette.”

11. Cancelled stamp: a shy, lonely female, the type one would describe as a “wallflower”

12. Cash: a smooch

13. Cake-eater: in the 1920’s refers to a “ladies’ man”; later, slang for homosexual

14. Cheaters: Glasses or bifocals

15. Choice bit of calico: a desirable woman

16. Darb: something deemed wonderful or splendid, similar to “berries”

17. Dewdropper: like lollygagger, a slacker who sits around all day and does nothing, often unemployed

18. “Don’t take any wooden nickels!”: “Don’t do anything dumb!”

19. Dumb Dora: an unintelligent woman

20. Egg: a person who leads an absurdly wealthy, extravagant lifestyle (see: Gatsby’s “West Egg”)

21. Four-flusher: someone who mooches off the money of others in order to feign wealth

22. Gasper: cigarette, “fag” (also of the 1920s)

23. Giggle water: liquor, alcoholic beverage

24. “Go chase yourself!”: “Get out of here!”

25. Handcuff: engagement ring

26. Half-seas over: shitfaced

27. Hayburner: a car with poor gas-mileage, a guzzler

28. Hotsy-totsy: attractive, pleasing to the eye

29. Icy mitt: rejection from the object of one’s affection, as in: “He got the icy mitt.”

30. Iron one’s shoelaces: to excuse oneself for the restroom

31. Jake: okay, fine, as in “Don’t worry, everything’s jake.”

32. Jorum of skee: a swig of alcohol, particularly hard liquor

33. Know your onions: to know what’s up or what’s going on

34. “Let’s blouse!”: “Let’s blow this popsicle stand!”

35. Manacle: Wedding ring

36. Mazuma: Dollar bills, cash, money

37. Mrs. Grundy: an uptight or very straight-laced individual

38. Noodle juice: tea.

39. “Now you’re on the trolley!”: “Now you’ve gotten it right!”

40. Oliver Twist: an extremely good dancer.

41. On a toot: on a bender

42. Ossified: drunk

43. Quilt: an alcoholic beverage that keeps you warm

44. Panther piss: whiskey, particularly homemade whiskey

45. Petting pantry: a cinema or movie theatre

46. “Phonus balonus!”: “That’s nonsense!” or “That’s horseshit!”

47. Pull a Daniel Boone: to upchuck

48. Reuben: a hick or redneck

49. Rub: a dance party for college or high school students

50. Sheba – someone’s girlfriend; or a sexually desirable woman

51. Sinker: a doughnut

52. Sockdollager: an event or action of great importance

53. Spifflicated: inebriated

54. “Tell it to Sweeney!”: what you say when you believe something to be untrue; “Tell it to someone who would buy that!”

55. Tomato: a woman

56. Upstage: arrogant, snobby

57. Whoopee: to have a good time, “make whoopee”

58. Wurp: wet blanket or person seen as a buzzkill (see: Debbie Downer)

59. Zozzled: shitfaced

Resume -Dorothy Parker
September 28, 2013, 12:03 am
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Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren’t lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

my attempt at free verse for my students
September 26, 2013, 9:35 pm
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my students begged me to write them a lil’ rhyming piece since it’s my least favorite thing to do in the whole world and they want to see me struggle. this is what i came up with a few minutes ago..

They don’t know my story
don’t know that they’re the objects of my affection
the indisputable glory, the undeniable satisfaction
I get from their poetic elopement, the countless hours I spend
trying not to become their next opponent

let them think I’m scared

I’ll seal up this love like baby birds in the womb
let them wonder why I care, just don’t let them assume
I’m another wanting to exclude
I will only exude that passion
I work for their reaction, make their words unfasten,
with the enthusiasm

of a poetic assassin.

all day all day all day
September 25, 2013, 8:16 pm
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September 25, 2013, 7:28 pm
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An old man with a new hat
is running out of pride.
I want to tell the truth
but I don’t know how.
The wind is our best pen
and it blows poetry out of the water.

I wait for days and weeks to enter
a feeling that’s had years to leave.
The ocean keeps throwing questions
it has all the answers to.
A candle lights a room
and dims the stars.

When all that consoled consoles no longer
loneliness finds a room inside the one it knows.
I am shrinking from the light
and turning into space.
An old man with a new hat
wears his smile in the dark.